Thursday, March 19, 2009

Love/Hate

As it seems that my first two series, entitled "Elevators" and "Ass Hat Awards" aren't really getting me anywhere, here is a new and slightly more generic (thus, hopefully more prolific) theme.

Things I love, and yet hate.

First in our series, inspired by the lovely Rachel:

Canadians.

I love that Canadians are so non-violent.

Yet I hate that they're so violently smug about it.

I love when Canadians end sentences with "eh?"

Yet I hate when "Eh?" is the entire sentence.

I love that Canadians have universal health care.

Yet I hate when I am forced to be exposed to their universal health care while in Canada. Because it sucks a fat one.

I love that Canadians are proud to wear their flag everywhere.

Yet I hate that they do this so to not be identified as Americans.

I love when Canadians point out that they burned down the White House in some random battle in the early 19th Century.

Yet I hate when Canadians forget that they were not actually doing that as an autonomous nation.

I love Strange Brew.

Yet I hate Canadian Bacon.

I once loved a Canadian boy.

Yet I hate him now. In retrospect, he was kind of a hoser.

I love that Canadians have the expression "hoser."

Yet I hate the fact that I can't use that expression without having to explain it.*

*I think it's important, in the spirit of international diplomacy, to end on a positive note.

1 comment:

Kurt said...

I guess your ambassadorship will be announced soon, since obviously you are fair and balanced.