It is time for me to disclose
That I know your kind well.
I can say your name in Latin,
Spanish, French, and Expletive
Especially the Expletive.
When I was eleven, I
Dressed up in camouflage
And startled a bunch of strangers
By telling them an Invading Army
"Don't just sit there - Do something!"
I intoned dramatically
To make sure they were all paying attention.
I took home the 4-H state entomology prize,
Two hundred dollars in federal treasury bonds
(I would cash it out in 1996 for a mere $174.)
But, I digress. The important
Point here is that I have had enough
Of your random periplaneta
Tag games with my person.
I do not fly into you, squirming poisonously.
Maybe I crinkle my nose, if I see you,
But no court in the land
Would see that as assault.
After a long day at work,
I would prefer to ignore your invading army
In my tropical city.
Let it rampage at will
Alive, as long as it leaves me alone.
But in the last week, as if drawn to
My forbearance, you've seen fit
To invade my bath time, my kitchen,
To crawl across my ceiling fan too high
For me to catch and release so
I lie in my bed awake because I am
Too afraid I will awake in the morning
With your taste in my mouth
Or a stray leg in my hair.
For $200 depreciating cash value
I once was the child expert
On how to kill you in
A myriad of painful ways.
I re-declare war.